My homosexuality just got in the road of “Going Green”. That sounds impossible. Yes, it does - but the fact is, even going with a Green Power electricity company means you are reminded that you are a second class citizen and that because you’re a “homo” - you’re different to everyone else. Maybe I’m being a little melodramatic - or, perhaps the absurdity of my “road block” is the absurdity. I’ll let you decide at the end. I just get tired of being reminded that I’m a big wooly woofta poofta - even when it’s something as simple as changing over an electricity account to a new provider.
Those of you who read my blog on a regular basis, or those who listen to my old podcast shows, will know that I am a Greeny True Hugging “homosexual” from way back. I love renewable energy and concepts around sourcing energy from energy efficient means such as wind and solar. A couple of years ago, a new electricity company came onto the market here in Sydney. They are Jack Green Energy. When Jack Green Energy came to the market, there were huge government tariffs on “green energy” that made their pricing just too expensive. The then government tariff seemed to penalise those who cared about where energy was sourced from. This was a diabolical concept to me when I learned of the tariff, and couldn’t help but feel that our federal government still couldn’t give a toss about green house gas emissions.
I have an overdue note in my journal to remind me to give Jack Green Energy a call to enquire on any changes to these tariffs. Yesterday a representative knocked on my door and advised he was from Jack Green Energy. I was happy to hear that these tariffs have now been abolished. There have been massive changes to their company and the best news of all is that Jack Green Energy now have full government backing and also receive support from a proud new partner, Planet Ark. This was music to my ears. It does get better, Jack Green Energy pricing @ /kWh (per kilo watt hour) is less than nearly all other local electricity suppliers. The minimum use of “green power” supplied to my home would be 10% of the total consumption. This is fantastic. I’m so happy to know that I have already made a difference. The remaining 90% of the energy our household will use will still be sourced from “black energy” from the local electricity grid. Black energy is a term used to describe electricity that is sourced from burning fuels, such as coal. Changing over to Jack Green Energy was a no brainer.
What does my homosexuality have to do with Going Green on our electricity bill? Well, the account of the current provider is in my partner’s name. As we have no de facto recognition in this country for homos, we’re just 2 men who live together and that’s it. Simon and I have been together for nearly 12 years. Other gay people will tell you 12 years is like 100 years in Gay relationships. It’s a great innings. It’s a topic for another blog post, but gay relationships face many untold road blocks that heterosexual people would never be aware of. As a sweeping statement to explain this, I find myself repeating my mantra … “Gay people have nothing to keep them together, but everything to keep them apart”. We are reminded by our system that we are not married or able to hang onto ‘de facto’ clauses. Be it a bank deposit into a “joint” bank account, visitation rights in hospitals when your partner is dying, or attempting to make changes to your phone or electricity bill - you’re a big wooly woofta and you have no access to this account. We need to speak to the account holder.
I was talked through the application form with the rep from Jack Green. As he was a door knocker rep of the company, when the application’s been completed, the rep makes a call to the office to have them approve and confirm all details by means of a recorded voice confirmation with the new account holder, “me”. By the time this happened, I have spent 30 - 40 minutes with the guy. We call through to the “confirmation hot line” to finalise the account and the call centre rep asks .. “are you the account holder on the current provider’s invoice?” I said, “No, I’m not, the account is in the name of my partner, Mr. Simon Kady.” The rep said, “Will she mind you signing over the account?” I said, “She’s a He named Simon, S.I.M.O.N. - He is my partner. He is a man. I am a man.” I am now embarrassed in front of the rep in my home and the bloke on the phone. Suddenly my new account has reduced me to explaining that I am a “raging homo in need of some green power”. It drives me spare. If my partner was a woman, the account would have been processed then and there. All the call centre rep asked or needed to know was, “would your partner (she) mind you changing over the account?”
I don’t really care too much about all the discussions centered around Gay Marriage. I’d probably marry Simon if it were possible, but that’s just a old age heterosexual institution that doesn’t really excite me. I have been in a relationship for longer than 50% of the marriages I know - most have failed. If I was in a de facto relationship of only 6 months - then I would have been able to change the account over. Instead, the rep had to call back in the evening and waste another 40 minutes, going through the same application form with Simon. All I want to see change in this country is that same sex couples have equal rights where others already have.
My homosexuality wasted time in my day.
This post is in no way a bad review of Jack Green Energy, rather it’s a reminder of some of the really dumb things homosexuals have to put up with - and shut up. I even feel like a winging homo in this post - but the fact is, I was reduced to embarrassment and inconvenience, simply because I’m a wooly woofta in a relationship that’s not recognised by my country’s federal law.
Notes: “Wooly Woofta” is a Australian slang term for another slang term, “Poofter” - which is a derogatory term for a male homosexual.
I am not Gay. I am a Poofter. If I were Gay that would imply I was Happy.
If you live in Australia & you’re interested in learning more about Jack Green Energy please visit their web site at http://www.jackgreen.com.au/ or click here.
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